Looking for Others to Recognize You?

Photo by David Stenbeck @dovneon on instagram

Photo by David Stenbeck @dovneon on instagram

Tell you what you can do? What you can achieve? How can they when they don’t know who you truly are and what you can do? You are the only one who can determine that.

How do you expect others to recognize you if they don’t have the wisdom you have?

We see our reflection in others. There were time in my life when I wasn’t recognizing myself. It’s still something I bring awareness too. I knew what I had to offer, but I wasn't owning it. Seeing it in myself. Still giving away my power to those I loved around me. They saw beautiful things in me, but not the extent of my capacity and what I could do. I don’t need to follow a traditional or “safe” life in a corporate. I can say with confidence now that I’m not meant to. I’m not saying there is anything wrong with a corporate life. That could be many people’s path and be very fulfilling. The thing we have to check in with is our internal compass and why we are doing something. Is it bringing joy? If not then we aren’t doing it for the right reason. For example - there are basketball players who love basketball so much and do it for the joy. Who are grateful. They are the ones that take time to sign autographs and give back. Then there are those who do it for the money or fame or because it makes their family “proud” of them. They are the ones that get lost in the image. Feel entitled to things because they “worked hard for it.” The resulting difference in true happiness inside is varied by these two examples. Not to judge as one way is good or bad. We all have done something of the sort in some area of our life. There is a difference in confidence and self worth and needing praise as validation. The person that is free in this scenario is doing this because it’s what they want to do. They are getting joy from this situation. Giving and Receiving.

The money will follow your true bliss. You will be cared for. Money is about flow. Allowing. Giving. And receiving. Not meant to control. Come from fear. Scarcity. Lack. There are millionaires and billionaires who are still poor. There are people who make money, but keep having to buy more things so they always remain poor. I saw this in corporate too. Saw managers wanting to keep the people in sales “hungry” by telling them to buy these big cars and houses once they got a large paycheck so their money would be gone again. There’s no judgment. You can have whatever you want. But do it for you. Not for others or for validation. I recently sold all of my designer things that I felt were controlling me. Things I had, but weren’t bringing me happiness. I only kept the pieces that I wasn’t attached too and if it got taken or I lost it I wouldn’t care. I realized I was so attached to a Chanel bag. Worrying about the logistics of traveling with it and leaving it behind. It was a symbol of my “hardwork” in corporate. I had always wanted a Chanel bag loving fashion growing up. But when I had it I felt like I should feel more happiness inside. But I felt nothing. It’s a pretty purse. Good quality. But I thought I should feel something more. I had always thought this would be the one thing I would keep forever. It was a surprise to me when I realized this was why I had to get rid of it. I didn’t want it controlling me. Am I saying I will never get Chanel or designer things again. I don’t know. I’m just releasing all attachment to things. I don’t want anything to own me. I will get something if I like it because I like it. But never become attached. This isn’t hate on designer things. I still have designer items. I like things that are good quality and will last. That are sustainable. But I’m not attached to it. If a Chanel purse really brings you joy then get it. Not telling everyone to get rid of things. But this bag was just a symbol really. It didn’t make me happy. As I cleaned out my closet I kept only the things that brought me joy - not because of what others would think but because I liked it. I got rid of things based on whether it did something for me instead of being based on is this a good investment or this purse is better etc.

Do it for you.

If something is owning you then you’re not free. If there are scarcity and lack programs then they will always exist no matter how much money you make. If you’re able to do work on it now - you’ll change the course of your life. To overcome this misconceptions will heal you from the inside out and allow you to creste a healthy relationship with money. You deserve whatever you want. You don’t have to be ashamed to want things or to be comfortable. It doesn’t mean you’re not a good person. It’s time to eliminate this frame of mind. This judgement on ourself and others. We need to take care of ourselves and treat ourselves how we want others to treat us. We are not meant to hoard and hold onto. It’s a reflection of not letting go of something inside. We don’t need things to prove our worth. They never will prove it to us. We are worthy because we are. I’m sorry that society made you believe that you had to do something to be worthy. You don’t need to do anything. You are worthy because you exist. Money, status, fame doesn’t prove it. And it will never achieve it for you unless you believe it inside. When you do believe it inside you will attract to you things that prove it in your reality because it resonates with your internal beliefs. But it’s about the inside matching the outside. Life is a mirror. Within and without. As above so below. 

Xo Jess